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Post by weakstick on Jan 28, 2011 22:35:43 GMT -5
Any tips or stories you want to share about trying to sell PE surgery with the wifey or girlfriend? I am not looking forward to bringing the subject up with my wife, in fact I am dreading it. My wife sometimes teases me about my size, but I don't think she is prepared for the bombshell I am about to drop on her. In fact I not sure she even knows PE surgeries exist. The costs of the procedures alone might cause her blow a gasket. I have the money in hand to this, but damn it seems selfish. Wow this is not going to be pleasant but I want to bigger so badly!
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Post by Skeptical One on Jan 29, 2011 1:15:56 GMT -5
I hope others chime in on this thread! It's an important part of your life when you know you have to bring this up to a loved one, and probably a very difficult task. Personally, I wish I could tell you (which is why I hope others chime in lol). I am currently single and don't have anyone to tell, nor would I want to tell anyone. Other than you guys of course! From what little I can contribute to this topic...If she is a loving/caring wife, then it would be beneficial to have her know at the very least. I'd imagine she's familiar with the family finances and will notice thousands of dollars missing. She'll also notice a significant (and immediate) change in your penis size. If it were a girlfriend, you could get away with it because there are so many excuses you could make. The wife, however, wont be so easily fooled (even if she doesn't know penis surgeries exist). Hard to hide that one under the radar from THE significant other lol. By the way, I hope her "teasing" is light-hearted, and I sure as hell hope she knows its not exactly healthy to humiliate a guy about their size, jokingly or not. I think one best course of action would be to bring it up subtly to her in a situation that is calm, collected, and relaxed. Maybe dinner or during a commercial break on TV. Tell her you have decided to look into ways in improving intimacy in the bed. Assure her its not her, but yourself. Tell her you have really been interested in turning up the heat and wanted to find ways to improve blood flow, erection quality, etc. At this point you haven't even referred to surgery but have slowly built up the case to "provide her increased pleasure." Then, in the long string of ideas (medicine, reading sex-tip books, getting into shape) you say aloud, throw in a "phallus enhancement," in there. Kind of casually along with all the other ideas. She may or may not catch it at first (let alone understand what it means). Follow this up with... "and yea, the phallus enhancement really seems promising. I accidentally bumped into that online and found a really intriguing clinic in such-and-such (this will be a reference to the surgical method you decide to choose) whose taking new clients (don't use the word patient, at least yet) for a trial procedure."
(yes this may be a stretch on the truth, but we will get to the full truth in time.)
Hopefully by now she has engaged the conversation and asked a question or made a statement. Regardless of the context of this response (LOL) you express a serious interest in reviewing it, that "maybe it'll add a little extra excitement for the both of us honey." She will probably respond and at this time you kind of drop it. Change the subject or maybe the TV show has come back on.
Then allow a few nights, maybe weeks pass (depending on how you gauge your wife's initial response), and bring it up again, more specifically. Explain to her that you've done a lot of research since the last convo and that you really feel like you are ready to jump in. At this point she'll want to know specifics.
... "Well, its such-and-such (name of procedure) done by Dr. John Doe in a World Class Clinic. The procedure will enhance the volume of the phallic unit (just pure bullshit it, let her catch on.) thus maybe giving us both a little extra more to look forward to."
"More what?" she might ask.
"Honey, listen, it costs $XXXX.XX and I'm planning to book my appointment in August."
She says, "WHAT!?"
"Honey, I'm doing this for us. I've thought long and hard (no pun intended) about this and really want to improve our love life. I wouldn't pursue this if I didn't think it would make me happy and us more intimate."
And if she is frustrated and still doesn't get it, then stop bamboozling and give her the details.
Just my 2cents lol.
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Post by honested on Jan 29, 2011 4:05:39 GMT -5
woah woah woah back up the truck
She sometimes teases you about your size?
Any girl I was with that did something like that would be gone.
Hopefully its in a playful manner and not something you take too much offense too.
Do you guys have a good relationship/sex life??
I definitely know what you are going through.
really hard to know what to do with these women.
I am not married, but have been with my girl for four years and we have a son together.
Honestly?
I want to keep her away from the experience all together. I want to go at it alone and make something up, like perhaps telling her that taking hormones made my penis bigger.
I am not preaching that as advice. Just telling you how I feel.
I guess I just have too much ego on the line. Sometimes I think it is MOSTLY about confidence and a little bit about your dick.
If you have REAL confidence, it will take you a very long way. Sometimes making your dick bigger gives you real confidence. Sometimes you just need real confidence, not a bigger dick. Sounds like bullshit but I promise you its not.
Guys like you and me though, are in a tough spot. Its really difficult to reinvent yourself after being with someone for a long time.
I guess what it really boils down to is why you are going to have the surgery.
Do you think it will make your wife love/want you more because it will improve your sex life?
Or do you just want to look in the mirror and think you have a fat dick.
Most likely it is both.
Admitting you are having the surgery is admitting you are insecure. Not sure how that one is going to go over but I certainly understand your fear.
I used to believe in love and that the girl who said she was in love with me would love and accept me for all that I am, but that fell through for sure...
I am telling you its all about confidence.
I would maybe just tell that you can afford it, that is not a big deal, and that although you like your dick now you would be really happy to boast a bigger cock.
I used to think that honesty was everything in my relationship and I speak from a place of discontent and anger in my relationship so maybe my advice is for shit.
It all depends on your marriage in my opinion.
I want my dick to be bigger and more or less have found a way to keep it from my partner.
I also want her to be tighter. Been looking at this kegelmaster tool and from a first hand source i heard it works really well. How the hell I am going to subliminally convince my girl to start using without asking and make her think it is her own idea, I have no clue.
You never want to lie to your wife, but man, wouldnt it be nice to just enjoy the benefits and, at the very least, tell her about it after its all over and done and ready to enjoy?
There is always honesty, though, god damnit.
Tell her exactly how you feel, whatever that may be.
I have accomplished nothing in this post, Im sorry.
I do think, however, that I am going to write a fucking book about PE, confidence, sexual technique, and the real way to get women to truly want you.
Let me know how it goes
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Post by weakstick on Jan 29, 2011 10:49:31 GMT -5
Thanks guys for the help so far. About the teasing, it is mostly in fun. One example of this when We had decided to adopt, we were laying in bed talking about the benefits and I jokingly said aleast our child won't inherent your bad temper and laughed. She quipped well atleast you won't be passing on your small penis gene if we had a son. So I had that one coming I guess. Though every once in a while in a fight she will play the small dick card on me. Overall she is a good wife though, and think I will keep her.
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Post by hoddle10 on Jan 29, 2011 10:53:23 GMT -5
Hi weakstick, what are your current erect length and girth stats?
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Post by stalemango on Jan 29, 2011 12:20:11 GMT -5
Great responses, Skeptical One and honested. I also want her to be tighter. Been looking at this kegelmaster tool and from a first hand source i heard it works really well. How the hell I am going to subliminally convince my girl to start using without asking and make her think it is her own idea, I have no clue. Try giving Cobb a call. He did quite a number on Mal. No matter how you tell your wife, you are better off doing so in the long run. The fantasy of wipping out your bigger, post-surgical penis and having her go, "Woah, where did that come from?!" seems great, but will be short lived the day after surgery. During the recovery period, you are going to be thankful that your wife is at your side and able to fetch items for you, change your bandages and provide much needed support in a time of uncertainty. Once she realizes that she benefits from the surgery, she will be all for it. Hate to sound like a Debbie downer, though, but make sure you inform her of the risks, too. You don't want her running off in the event things don't go as planned.
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Post by weakstick on Jan 29, 2011 15:12:15 GMT -5
Hi weakstick, what are your current erect length and girth stats? Hoddle about 5.5 inches long, I can't remember the exact girth. My biggest insecurity is my flaccid length. Oh yea my wife had a few black boyfriends before me, so I hear about how white guys are minuet. Another poster ask about our sex life, it is ok. Maybe this is typical, but I usually have to instigate it, and I get shut down more times than not. I know this post makes her sound like a serious bi***, but she really isn't.
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Post by stalemango on Jan 29, 2011 15:27:16 GMT -5
Oh yea my wife had a few black boyfriends before me, so I hear about how white guys are minuet. Take it from a black guy who has seen a fair share of black penises. The stereotype could not be further from the truth. I don't know where it comes from and I don't care to research it, but some people reference adult films as proof. If you notice, it's the same 8-10 guys who are in the videos.
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Post by honested on Jan 29, 2011 15:45:15 GMT -5
Weakstick,
I hope I didnt come off as insensative. I was a little bit drunk last night when I wrote that lol.
Joking or not, it hurts like hell to hear her say that doesn't it?
Stalemango-
Hope you don't take offense to this, but you are proof that black guys are bigger!!
You are bigger than the majority of the guys on this forum.
I don't know that there is any truth to it. Some studies have shown that many african ethnicities produce more of the hormone DHT during puberty and, on average, have slightly larger penises. I think one study I ready showed an average of 5.5 for caucasians and and average of 5.6 or 5.7. for black men.
Not much difference, and it was probably done buy a bunch of white doctors with small dicks.
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Post by Skeptical One on Jan 29, 2011 16:20:18 GMT -5
weakstickI'd be considerably annoyed if my wife or girlfriend played those cards against me, either jokingly or in a fight. In my opinion, if you took her deepest insecurity and used it against her, it would likely have the same psychological affect ... she should know better.
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Post by stalemango on Jan 29, 2011 18:53:56 GMT -5
honested, No, I don't take any offense, but the stereotype always hit close to home prior to surgery and it causes feelings of inadequacy in males of all colors. I've seen it linger in the mind of some non-blacks if their woman has been with a black male and I'm proof that it makes some black men who are average feel inadequate. Further, if I was to subscribe to the belief that black penises are 'naturally' bigger, then I'd have to agree that blacks are 'naturally' less civilized, which I don't. As far as my photographs go, I swear it must be the camera or close-ups which make it appear larger than it really is. weakstick, The next time your lady makes a comment about you being small, stick it in the other hole and see if she changes her tune. ;D In all seriousness, your flaccid length should be the least of your concerns when it comes to your lady.
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Post by idm on Jan 30, 2011 1:01:02 GMT -5
I'd get the new dick... maybe just let her see it (but not touch it)...reminder her of what she said... then get a new wife!
Idm
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Post by honested on Jan 30, 2011 1:58:07 GMT -5
Mango, here is the deal. Your dick is 7" long and 7" in girth at the base. Stereotypes or not, YOU HAVE A BIG DICK. ha. Make sure thats in your head and don't forget it. Further, just to be an ass, I would say that, since you don't think you have a big dick, maybe you compare yourself to other black men with huge members, thus thinking you are small when really you are big. This is more evidence that black men are indeed packing more on average! Sorry for being an idiot. Weakstick, I really do want to help you out man. Getting denied is just not what anyone deserves and goddamnit you can change that shit if you really want to!!! I hope I am not bursting your bubble, but getting the surgery alone probably isn't going to make your wife you a lot more than she does now. It may, but from what I gather this is unlikely. For women, sex is much much more mental than it is physical. I do think that there is definitely both a mental and physical turn on from a big penis, but again, it's about confidence. Confidence is not always outwardly and openly expressed, it comes from within and only when you truly have it will a woman be able to feel it. Now, the beauty of a bigger dick is you get both the mental and the physical. In my realtionship, I am struggling because I feel as though I'm still in the prime of my sexuality, and we are not breaking the head board every night, or really any night. There is very natural feeling inside of me to want to attract and dominate women, and now I know how to do it. I have a lot of confidence in my looks, talents, humor etc., and even sexual ability. I am just lacking in size, which, god help me, I can change. At that point I cannot fucking wait. Feels like I want to go on a conquest or something and just start slaying bitches. The problem is, I am in love with my gf. After lacking confidence in bed and failing to really gain the upper hand and control of our sexual relationship, I find it really hard to believe that the way she sees me and is attracted to me will ever change, and I want to have that deep passion with someone, most of all her. You can stuff a big dick inside a woman all you want, but if she is not dripping wet and filled with desire for you beforehand, it is not going to matter much at all. That is a fact. For years I didn't believe it but it is nothing but the truth. If you have a woman that deeply wants you, than you don't need much dick to rock her world. I've said this in other threads before, I hope I don't sound redundant. So, more or less, my advice to you if you are going to change your dick size would be to also change the way you approach sexuality in your relationship. DISCLAIMER I may be a fool. Really I'm no fool, I just don't want you take my advice, lose your wife, then hunt me down and kill me. I don't know a great deal about a real commitment to giving in and absoultely trusting eachother, sharing a real partnership for life. I have tried to have them, and have always found that the hot sex I wanted went missing when I completely gave in to my woman. I do think you can have both, but it is something of an art in motion and just takes a lot. I guess what I am saying is that getting the woman you love to want and love you the way you want her to, in my experience, can not be done through kissing her ass and treating her like a queen, even if you think she is one. Again, I would challenge you to question exactly why it is you want to have this done. If you are content with your wife and your sex life, then there is no need for it. If you are looking for more out your sex life, you need to do more than get a bigger dick. You may be aware of all of this, but it's just my two cents. Finally, sex is momentary, but true love is damned hard to find. So I feel your pain in having the talk. My trouble with telling my gf the whole truth is like this, in that moment when you are having the argument and she makes fun of your dick, instead, she can just say "well you have a fake dick" or something along those lines. Childish as it sounds, having that power over women, knowing that they can't hurt you by knocking your manhood is big deal. I don't think being competitive or seeking power is the recipe for healthy relationship, but I sure as shit am hell bent on it anyway. If you have a real partnership that is healthy and loving, then a bigger dick sounds like just a perk and something that will make your bond stronger. Your wife should be all for it, especially if you tell her that's why you want to have it done. Be as relaxed and open as you can when you talk to her, and have confidence!! Maybe you could downplay the cost somehow? A 5 figure surgery expresses your absolute desperation for getting this done, which is not attractive. I don't know how I am going to get that done either. If you have to bite the bullet, just go for it. Sorry for writing you a novel. Best, Honested
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Post by iain01 on Jan 30, 2011 8:04:25 GMT -5
well the way I went about it was, I downloaded a few short clips of adult films one of which had a girl pumping her clit, we got drunk and started watching it, when the pumping one came on I mentioned how horny it was to see a girl with a huge clit and jokeingly said I should get her one, she said ok. So anyway a few days later I txted her to sy I got her one, but all they had was a pumpers kit which had a male one too, So next time we met I put it on her and she got very horny, pumping makes girls go wild, lol anyway I said I would try mine for a laugh, After about 30 mins she was gagging for it and when I pulled mine out the pump and she saw it she went wild and now weather I pump her or not she wants mine pumped shes just happy to be stretched,anyway in short thats how I did it
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Post by iain01 on Jan 30, 2011 8:18:31 GMT -5
One other thing and I know its off topic but its the black size argument, I have done sports all my life and have to say yes blacks are bigger, so I guess its really hard if a black guy has a small penis because all the girls expect him to have a larger one than normal, in fact its one of the reasons I started pe Me and my girl where on a nudist beach and she saw this huge black guy and she she just couldnt stop staring at him, the next day he was having his usuall shower on the beach and she didnt even try and hide the fact she was looking at him and he knew it and started to get hard man he was big, but just seeing how much she got excited made me want to make her like that. so thats how I started pumping, and by the way it doesnt make you any bigger in the long term as I have been doing it for a couple of years now just lasts about 4 hours
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